I began to get serious about making concentrated efforts to teach Isaac God’s Word when he was a little over a year and a half. I’ll never forget our first “lesson”! We did the story of Jonah and it was a blast! We read the story from various children’s Bibles, did some activities, acted the story out and even had a Jonah lunch! I, of course, wanted to add in some application, and so we talked about how important it is to obey God.
The end.
The end.
As I opened the pages of the book Give Them Grace
, I got a sinking feeling as I read. Her opening example? Teaching the story of Jonah to your kids. She gives an example of a mother teaching her kids the story and it looked pretty similar to mine in a lot of ways. This mom even used blue jello as a snack to represent the water. I wish I had thought of that! This mom was doing a great job of raising her kids in a godly, Christian home. And then…
The author reveals that this mother was actually a member of a cult that uses the Bible as part of the training of their children.
, I got a sinking feeling as I read. Her opening example? Teaching the story of Jonah to your kids. She gives an example of a mother teaching her kids the story and it looked pretty similar to mine in a lot of ways. This mom even used blue jello as a snack to represent the water. I wish I had thought of that! This mom was doing a great job of raising her kids in a godly, Christian home. And then… The author reveals that this mother was actually a member of a cult that uses the Bible as part of the training of their children.
Ummm... okay... thanks for that boost of confidence.
The authors go on to explain their point. Teaching the story of Jonah like I did, while not necessarily wrong, is the same way a Jewish or Mormon family would teach their kids the story.
So, is this a problem? Well, that simply means there’s nothing distinctly Christian about it.
So, is this a problem? Well, that simply means there’s nothing distinctly Christian about it.
Most religions of the world want their kids to be moral. Am I simply turning the Bible into a religious Aesop’s Fables? NO! So what makes my parenting and the way I teach my kids Christian?
The answer: The gospel.
I am a sinner saved by grace through Jesus Christ.
No other religion in the world offers that. He is the Only Way.
So if he is the distinguishing factor, how do I make sure that Jesus Christ permeates my parenting? If he is what my children really need, how do I make sure that HE is the focus and not just "getting my children to behave"?
As I’m showing my Awana kids on Wednesday nights, Jesus is the Big Picture of the Bible. He was part of the plan at the Creation of the world. Everything in Scripture points to HIM. So, does my parenting lead my boys to Jesus? Does the way I teach my kids the Bible show them their need for a Savior and the wonderful gift of the Messiah?
I think out of fear I tend to make the law (God's commands) the focus in my parenting. I teach them ABOUT Jesus, but Jesus doesn't really affect my parenting. I lay out the rules and expect them to be followed. When they don't meet those expectations, I correct them, and then punish them for falling short.
The end.
Please understand, I am NOT saying that I shouldn't have rules and consequences with my kids. That would be a disaster! But I think when my parenting begins and ends with the law and doesn't include grace in the equation, I miss out on a HUGE teaching opportunity. An opportunity to point them to Christ.
(As a side note, I know this post could raise a LOT of questions. Right now my point is my perspective and understanding of all this as a parent. I'll explain the practical affect it has on my discipline in a post next week. I wish I could get in all down in one post clearly and concisely, but alas, I'm not that good with words.)
When I parent with grace, I'm preaching the gospel to myself and my child on a day to day, sometimes moment to moment basis. I'm reminding us both that we're not going to get this right. I want my kids to see they can't EARN this. Practice WILL NOT make perfect. I know. I've tried. What a beautiful thing to show my kids, that even though there are rules in this house, there is grace when they're broken. That doesn't mean there aren't consequences. It means we try to look to Jesus to put things back in perspective when things go wrong.
I am very thankful that I have been shown in a fresh way the absolute necessity of the gospel in the way I parent. If you're like me, this is where some guilt may set in. This is NOT how I've been viewing parenting. Ninety percent of the time my parenting has been law driven (And there is a definite place for showing your kids God's rules and setting them as the standard in your home. I'll talk about that more on Monday!). But the more I've thought about all this, the more encouraged I am (and thankful, once again, for grace!). The gospel is essential for my family all day, every day. We can cling to and find rest in the forgiveness that has been given to us for the rest of our lives. It's not something that saved my husband and I and now we've moved on knowing that we should make sure and try to get our kids on board along the way. The gospel is a critical factor in everything we do RIGHT NOW. We can't parent without it.
So, how would Jonah Day at the Miller house look different today? Well, we'd do all the same activities. We'd still have lots of fun. But I'd make sure to point out that God showed mercy to Jonah when he disobeyed and mercy to the people of Ninevah. Both were undeserving of this grace, just like us, but God is a loving God who gives us good things that we don't deserve, namely his very own Son. Would he understand it all? Well, probably not. But one thing I like about starting things early with my boys is that it helps ME. The longer I practice doing things when they're younger, the more comfortable I hope to feel with these unchartered territories when they're older and it starts to matter most.
Please understand that I am not saying that EVERY time I read the Bible with Isaac and Silas I'm going to be talking about Jesus and the Cross and salvation. (Though I don't think this would be wrong.) I'm just learning that the Gospel needs to play a much more central role in our home. It's easy for me to divide the stories up into simple moral lessons on how my kids and I should act. Instead I want to show them that they can never be good enough on their own... even if they obeyed Mommy perfectly. I want to show them that Mommy can't be the perfect Mom either. I want them to see the beauty of a forgiving Savior who makes up for the failures of ALL of us. I want to lead them to Jesus.
For those of you who may feel a little overwhelmed by all of this (as I did), and the thought of having to try and connect any story outside of the 4 gospels to the gospel makes you feel totally inadequate (as it did me), don't lose heart! Tomorrow I'm sharing a practical printable I made to help with "pointing to the gospel" in my teaching.
For those of you who may feel a little overwhelmed by all of this (as I did), and the thought of having to try and connect any story outside of the 4 gospels to the gospel makes you feel totally inadequate (as it did me), don't lose heart! Tomorrow I'm sharing a practical printable I made to help with "pointing to the gospel" in my teaching.
You might be interested in checking out the other posts from our Gospel-Centered Parenting series:
Introduction: A Major Shift in My Parenting Mindset
Part 1: Back to the Basics
Free Printable: The Gospel in the Bible
Part 3: Instilling a Realistic View of Self
Part 4: How Gospel-Centered Parenting is Looking for Us on a Practical Level
You are welcome to use any ideas or printables shared on this blog for your personal use only. Please do not use any photos without prior consent. If you decide to blog about something you have seen here, please provide a link back to this blog. Thank you!
Loving this series! Thanks for being brave enough to share it :)
ReplyDeleteI think you're so right about making Jesus the center of our teaching. I've been thinking about that a lot lately, (even though I'm Mormon). We really do need to remember that Jesus, the atonement, forgiveness, grace, all of those things are often found in stories outside of the Gospels. It is very easy to get focused on moral parenting! So easy! Thank you! Jesus is the reason of the season, as well as the reason for the morals! :)
ReplyDeleteThank you so much!! I've been having the same thoughts but getting caught up in how to change from Moral parenting to Christian. Now I'm seeing the better picture :)
ReplyDeleteI always try to teach my son that Jesus=God. That's what the base of Christianity is, and why all the Bible stories are about Him. I realize the Trinity is a concept outside anyone's understanding, but making sure he knows that Jesus is more than a man, He is God, is crucial. It's what sets apart these apart from the "moral" stories used by other religions, or by people who see the Bible as a collection of moral concepts.
ReplyDeleteThank you for the challenge to remember to bring grace into how we understand God- He was making Jonah obey, but He was also protecting Jonah's life, so that he would learn and obey God's instruction and people would know God's love and forgiveness. He had to experience that forgiveness and unearned salvation in a deeper way to be able to preach it to others.
This post is awesome! My friend sent it to me via email and I'm so encouraged. I have a children's Bible to recommend as well. It is called The Jesus Storybook Bible: Every Story Whispers His Name by Sally Loyd-Jones. We just came across it and it is wonderful for teaching the Bible to my kids and pointing them to Jesus with every story. They also have a CD version which my boys love. Highly recommend it!!
ReplyDeleteThanks for you encouragement, Mandy! And YES! We love, love the The Jesus Storybook Bible. Love. I wish I had known how much I was going to love it when I bought it because I would have gotten the deluxe version with the cd as well. :( You might be interested in The Gospel in the Bible printable we made (the link's at the bottom of this post). It's based heavily on The Jesus Storybook Bible and can be slipped in the front of any Bible that your kids like to hear stories from as a quick reference! It's so nice to hear from others who are working through all of this and trying to help their kids see the message of grace found throughout the entire Bible! -Desiré
DeleteInteresting, myself and my un/non-Christian family already teach the story of Jonah and the Whale with a focus on Christ and his infinite forgiveness of our sins.
ReplyDeleteThat sounds like a very Christian thing to be teaching. Maybe you are actually Christian.
DeleteWhile we welcome comments on this blog (even if they don't agree with us), things that include name calling or are turned into a "debate" will be deleted. If you wish to discuss my stance on anything in this post with me directly, please e-mail me at whenurise@gmail.com.
ReplyDeleteI disagree with your assessment that Mormons aren't Christian.
DeleteWhich religion did you refer to as a "cult" in the article? What is your definition of "cult?" Or was it just "name calling?" I know you're well-intentioned, but you have to realize that the language you've been taught to use can lead to good followers of Christ (I know you've been taught that they aren't Christian, but they are) to be offended.
DeleteI skimmed through some of the areas of the book you were referring to, and while I know it's well-intentioned (and even offers some good advice), I couldn't believe how misinformed the author is about Mormonism. While we believe in works, we are fully aware that we are saved by grace through Jesus Christ. We do not have the power or capability to save ourselves, but we must be ready and willing to accept Christ's grace. That's why we believe works are necessary. The use of the word "cult" by the author(s) is particularly telling. What does the word mean? It doesn't mean anything at all. It's a word intended to incite fear about the subject. I'm specifically referring to this quote: "It's no wonder that so many of them are lost to utter rebellion or to works-based cults such as Mormonism as soon as they are free to make an independent choice." Saying we are "works-based" is false. We know that grace is by far the most important aspect of salvation. It isn't our works that saves us; it's the grace that we must be ready to accept through the faith that we demonstrate and develop through our works. I honestly believe that you believe the exact same thing. True faith is accompanied and even enhanced by works.
I hope this does not result in a "debate," but rather a discussion. I hope you allow discussions in the comment section.
Hi Anonymous!
DeleteI will say from the outset that it is really hard to disagree with someone in writing without coming across as rude or difficult, but my prayer is that you will see that I write this with a heart of love and not out of a feeling of superiority or arrogance. I know our beliefs are central to who we are and how we live, so I understand that this could feel like an "attack." I assure you that is not my intention and will do my best to convey that.
Your question about my definition of a “cult” is a valid one. I’m actually thankful for the opportunity to clarify what I mean by that word! While popular society often thinks of a cult as being a group of people with strange beliefs, rituals, and practices, I adhere to a more “theological” understanding of the word. The ESV Study Bible defines it well:
A “cult” is any religious movement that claims to be derived from the Bible and/or the Christian faith, and that advocates beliefs that differ so significantly with major Christian doctrines that two consequences follow: (1) The movement cannot legitimately be considered a valid “Christian” denomination because of its serious deviation from historic Christian orthodoxy. (2) Believing the doctrines of the movement is incompatible with trusting in the Jesus Christ of the Bible for the salvation that comes by God’s grace alone. [p. 2631]
Here’s another explanation I found helpful from Denny Burk:
"Typically they (a cult) are founded or led by a person who claims to have received direct revelation from God that supersedes the Bible. The theological error inherent in cults usually involves some aberration of the doctrine of the Trinity or the doctrine of Christ such that the resulting belief system is no longer Christian."
So, that’s my understanding of a cult and here’s why I believe Mormonism falls into that category. The following is part of an e-mail I wrote in response to some concerns regarding my view of Mormons that I thought might be helpful to post here as well:
I had a couple of good friends who were Mormon in high school. I regularly discussed my faith with one of them (and likewise they shared their beliefs with me). While I believe Mormons to be very moral and strive to follow what they believe, I do not believe that we have a "unity of faith." While I understand that you believe in Jesus and consider him your Savior, I do not believe that we have the same understanding of what the gospel is.
While I understand that individual Mormons may hold different views on these issues, my understanding is that as a general rule, Mormons do not hold to the following:
-The Bible is the inerrant and complete Word of God.
-The Trinity (Three essences, one God)
-That it is grace alone that saves us (it is not at all conditioned up whether or not we follow it up with baptism and good works/obedience). Here's more of my thoughts on that issue... the only dissenting comment to the post was by a sweet Mormon reader we have which might help you see more clearly how we differ on the issue of grace: http://www.whenyourise.com/2011/11/back-to-basics.html
-God preserved his Church, Word and the gospel from Christ on and that there was no need for restoration.
I believe these differences to be so critical that to not agree on ALL of these fundamental truths, is to not believe in the same gospel, not to trust in the same Savior... and in the end to not be Christian.
Because the point of this post is not Mormons, but instead pointing children to the true gospel as we teach and parent them, all discussion on this post relating to this matter will end here. If you’d like to voice your opinion on the matter further, you may e-mail me at whenurise@gmail.com.
Ephesians 2:8-9
DeleteFor by GRACE are you saved, through FAITH and that NOT OF YOURSELVES it is a gift of God- NOT OF WORKS lest any man should boast.
Thank you for being willing to present the gospel clearly and biblically. Thank you for sharing the truth.
Deleteexcellent....
ReplyDeleteSad- was going to repin this site until I realized you are a judge of others. If someone claims to be a Christian and claims to follow Jesus Christ (that same Jesus that was born of Mary, healed the blind, bled and died on the cross and rose the 3rd day) then you have no reason telling them they are not Christian. Who are you to judge what is in their heart? Last I heard, the definition of a Christian is someone who has accepted Jesus as their Lord and Savior.
ReplyDeleteLove this post! Thanks for sharing, it was refreshing to read this morning.
ReplyDeleteThis is amazing! Thank you so much for sharing! I agree with all the things you have said. I just found out I am pregnant with my first. I am a missionary, and my job is to clearly present the Gospel to children. But when it comes to parenting it's difficult to understand how to fit it in. Thanks!
ReplyDeleteDesiré, first of all, I really appreciated your blog. You expressed this thought very well, and helped me understand some of my frustrations I've felt about this very topic. Secondly,thank you for your courage in speaking Biblical truth. We live in a day when that is not a socially acceptable thing to do, just as Christ said would happen. I look forward to reading some of your other ideas!
ReplyDeleteThank you for your encouragement.
DeleteNot sure if someone else mentioned this but "The Jesus Storybook Bible" by Sally Lloyd-Jones points every story to Jesus, it's amazing. At the end of the Jonah story, it says, "Many years later, God was going to send another Messenger with the same wonderful message. Like Jonah, he would spend three days in utter darkness. But this Messenger would be God's own Son. He would be called "The Word" because he himself would be God's Message. God's Message translated into our own language. Everything God wanted to say to the whole world - in a Person.
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